By Kim Wolinski, MSW ~ "Dr. DeClutter"
Getting ready for "back to school" days can mean different things to different people. What does it mean to you? If you just responded with fear, anxiety, and stress over hearing the voices of your angels saying, "Mom, where’s my homework?" "Mom, where’s my lunch?" or "Dad, I can’t find my books and helmet," you’re not alone!
I want to help you keep your vow to be more organized and less stressed this year by offering you some preventative medicine, rituals, time savers and other organizing tips to help you and your children enjoy the start of another glorious school year!
Ritual #1: The "Back to School" Declutter Appointment
Enlist the help of everyone and get the house in order before school starts. A good deadline for everyone's room to be spotless is the Sunday night before school starts. Starting off with a clean house, rooms, porch, etc. creates a good sense that this is something new and positive and gives a baseline to how "clean" is supposed to look!
Ritual #2: Make a Fresh StartNo matter what your income, it’s nice for children to have some new clothes (even if they’re only new to them), new supplies, etc. with which to return to school. For some it can mean one or two new pieces of clothing or a pair of shoes, for another it’s a new backpack or office supply that helps them to enjoy studying more. This means organizing closets and drawers to sort out the old and decide on the new. If your child has outgrown last years clothes, again, and they are still nice and wearable, have a yard or porch sale – make some money selling them and use that money to get new ones! The Back To School clothing sales will start soon!
Ritual #3: Ask Questions, Find Out AnswersAs soon as possible ask your school and your child for a list of what they are going to need and the schedule for everything. Get off to a solid start with all of the right information the first time. This includes necessary supplies, equipment, lunch money, activities fees, sports and other schedules, etc.
Ritual #4: School Information CentralTake all of the information from your Q&A and write it on the Family Calendar. This calendar needs to be in the kitchen, by the phone and where everyone can see it and add to it as necessary. Make sure everyone checks it so that there are no double-bookings when they can be avoided. Don’t let the "I didn’t knows" create crises, anger, stress and hurt feelings. If you have room, use a bulletin board where you can post the calendar, schedules, announcements, and invitations where they will not get lost and everyone can see and comment on them. For daily notes, get a dry-erase board for your frig or wall for quick notes that can be wiped off and changed daily.
Ritual #5: Systems For Sanity
Teaching your children basic organizing skills and self-responsibility now will make them into much better children and adults. A lot of trees will be cut down just so that your child will be able to bring home lots of paper! One way to curb this chaos is to put a three-tiered wire or plastic basket by their bedroom door, or your kitchen counter. Teach them to sort through their own backpacks and put papers that need "To Be Signed" by mom/dad in the top basket; another basket for "Important Stuff Mom/Dad Needs" (PTA info., fund-raisers, school policies, etc. Help your child know what these would be); and a basket for "Art & Awards" to be used as scrapbooking ideas and keepers. (Move these items to labeled plastic tubs for organized storage.) And, set some rules, like, "If it’s not in the top basket by bedtime, it doesn’t get signed that night!" These tools and tips eliminate the last minute papers waving in your face, stress and bad feelings for the day and also gives you time to actually READ what you are signing! Also, make sure that you are on top of doing your part each night to check the files and go through them for your reading, approval and signature. Getting this system down will make a big difference.
Ritual #6: Family MeetingsIf you haven’t started this tradition yet, it’s never too late. We make schedules and appointments for so many things and for others but often forget to actually sit down, meet with, talk to, listen to and enjoy our own children. Designate one night of the week when everyone can be there, plan an hour or more to discuss and plan the upcoming week and share how school is going so everyone’s on the same page.
Ritual #7: Fight-No-More Solutions
Sit down with your family and discuss what your routine arguments and hot spots are each year. Get out paper and pen and have each person help create solutions for pre-determining how to fix it. Here are some examples:
- Pre-Pick Daily Clothes: Stop morning delays and drama by laying out clothes on the bed or a chair the night before.
- Bed-Time Blues: Kids need their sleep for better health. So do parents! Stick to a schedule of lights out and up again as well as meal times when the kids are home.
- Sleep Routine: "B" above also means getting your child’s sleep-schedules and routines ready for the school year. If they’ve been up late all summer they’re going to need some practice going to bed earlier and getting their minds and bodies ready for the change. At least two weeks before school starts, re-introduce a school year bedtime. Get them started earlier and earlier, closer to the hour they'll need to rise when school begins.
- Forgetting Things: No one forgets everything, but maybe certain things. Isolate out the problem areas and get ahead of it.
You will have a "Fight-No-More" list particular to your family, just make sure to sit down together and spend time listening to and helping them to better pre-plan their year; make better choices.
Ritual #8: RoutineThere’s a general routine to adult jobs and children’s school. The first week's routine can be made as close to a normal school week as possible so that it doesn’t feel overwhelming, or extra stressful, or a let down when it’s over and it’s "back the same grind." This means committing to make the above 7 tips a reality so that the first week runs smoothly. This creates a great path for the following weeks, and less "grind!" Good luck and have a great new Back to School Year!
©2004 Kim Wolinski, MSW “Dr. DeClutter”Stress, Change and Organizational Skills ExpertNeed help getting your space (house, office, barn, backyard – thoughts, mind, time, schedule, priorities, or life) decluttered and re- organized? My new video “BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN, AND OTHER ORGANIZING TIPS AND TOOLS FROM DR. DECLUTTER” is a great help. You can find out more or order BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN at http://www.redecisionsinstitute.com/kims_store.htmlEditors and publishers are free to reprint blog articles as long as it is reprinted in its entirety and the signature line remains intact.
